Structural shift

‘Street creep’ is a term known to builders, engineers and home inspectors.

It can be found in neighborhoods with traditional infrastructures – curb and gutter and the like.  Here’s how it works:

–          A paved road expands, placing pressure on an adjacent hard-surface driveway.

–          Under tremendous outside pressure, the entryway in turn moves toward its assigned home.

–          The home’s foundation is in turn nudged slowly but surely away from the road, unsettling the structure it supports.

Street creep can be a costly fix for homeowners.  At best it requires superficial repair.  At worst the structure must be reconciled to its foundation.  It is not small stuff.

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There are implications for those of us who reside outside of the world of residential engineering and public works.

To better understand where I’m headed, you need to know just a few things about me:

1. I rented my homes for most of my adult life.  All were interesting, old and unsafe.  The positive spin: charming and affordable.
2. A few years ago, after working to make homes possible for other people, I caught a series of breaks that landed me in a home I own.  It is surprisingly conventional – a three-bedroom ranch in a new neighborhood.  Simply put, though unlikely for me, this is my home at this time for a reason.
3. I believe each human soul is a beloved child of God – all uniquely important and equally valuable.  The world does not work in an ideal fashion insofar as our birth luck is concerned.  Bill Gates calls this the ‘ovarian lottery.’  It is everyone’s job to right the wrong of random opportunity distribution.
4. Similarly, I believe the “things” of the world do not belong to us.  There are enough assets in the world to meet every human need, however, they are unevenly distributed.  Again, it is everyone’s responsibility to balance the distribution through sharing and conscious non-consumption.
5. I believe this so strongly I did not fix a crack in my car windshield for several years.  Yes, I said years.  I have insurance.  Even without it, this is a cheap fix, yet I couldn’t rid myself of the notion that taking that sheet of glass that really wasn’t necessary for my survival stole natural resources from the hands of some distant and not-yet-known kid across the globe.
6. A lot of things inform my ideology but none as much as Koinonia Farm in Sumter County, GA.  This “demonstration plot for the Kingdom of God” was founded in 1942 and is still alive and kicking.  Among Koinonia’s many simple and workable solutions to the world’s reality is the “fund for humanity.”  Community members share their assets – money, possessions and know-how – and each member takes from the fund according to her needs.  This fund and the call to make each day’s actions reflect God’s Kingdom on Earth remain strong influences on my beliefs and actions.
7. Unrelated to all of this, I stopped watching television about four years ago.  There is no good reason – it just happened.  Recently I found myself with some time on my hands and need for entertainment.  I plugged in the TV.  Although it began as a search for folly, it is now used primarily as a background-noise alternative to public radio.

Enough background.

~~~

It is because of my newly reinstated television that I know about street creep.

HGTV rocks.  It is 229 on my remote and has been a contender for preferred background noise for about three weeks.  It meets my need for outside connection along with my love for construction and design.

For someone obsessed with simplicity, the extravagance of the programming has been shocking.  Million Dollar Rooms, Selling New York and Million Dollar Contractor are just a few.  Learning that people spend a half million on a single swimming pool or turn down luxury homes for inadequate opulence (the insult of ‘near perfection’) was a jaw-dropping cultural lesson.

This week the television played at low volume while I organized and cleaned.  I wasn’t actively listening, so it surprised me when I looked around my living room and thought, “I really should have gone with a builder that offers granite and crown molding standard.”

What?!  Really?  No, really?

This internal value shift hit me like a ton of brick.  My inner rebar shook at the mercy of the unexpected 9.0 quake that rattled me to the core.

I’ve come a long way baby – from solidly set on my foundation to serious backsliding.  As Patty Griffin sings, “Sometimes you wonder if you’re walking in the wrong di-rection.”

And how!  I have some work to do.  The nature of this fix is not home improvement but soul improvement.

Comfort and even luxury are not themselves a ‘problem.’  There is room for everything in this world.  It’s just that the mere thought of doubting my intended home’s adequacy – and my related worth – is 180 degrees off from my values and strongest beliefs, including my theology.

It just isn’t me.

A gradual numbing to my own ideals and the creeping of accepted American standards nudged me off my own foundation.  I didn’t sense the subtle shift until the damage was done.

~~~

Take a look through the lens of the ‘foundational’ principles of street creep:

–          The roadway of life’s values takes up too much space and imposes on our real estate.

–          The entryways into our personal lives are in turn repositioned, forcing the beliefs of the outer world on our inner lives.

–          In turn, our foundations are challenged – cracked, moved and separated from our inner structures

This is a potentially costly situation.

I don’t need television’s Dr. Phil or The Doctors to give me the diagnosis.  I have an invasive case of Stealth Asset Creep.  Uh-huh, I have been SACed by my TV.

I unknowingly sold out.

~~~

Damage assessment

The specific values aside, there are two penultimate down-here-on-Earth problems inherent in my recent shift.  (There is a third, more important issue, but we’ll pick that up later.)

1. The first is how little time and exposure it took for my solid undergirding to be undermined.  Background noise, remember?  More than 20 years of belief in action were turned around in three weeks of home-improvement television.
2. The second is how easily I internalized the perceived gap in my assets as evidence of my personal worth.  The words in my head during the “incident” were about home-building options.  The feeling, however, was a deep knowing that I am not worthy of the expanded option list so many others take for granted.  I deserve my lot, its inadequacy a reflection of me. I am not up to code.

Where is the person who doesn’t replace a car windshield unnecessarily?  How about the one who believes the “stuff” of the world does not belong to us – that it’s our daily responsibility to help equalize the distribution for our brothers and sisters who have real and crushing need?

The hippie bumper sticker seen around Durham is right: Turn off your TV and think for yourself!

Dear HGTV, I want my brain back.

~~~

Where else does stealth “creeping” happen in our lives?

Culture’s daily onslaught of messaging is not limited to television.  We know this.

There are bazillions of judgments about any number of things that hit us all day, every day.  From billboards to the check-out line to popular opinion, there is an army of messengers in battle for our souls, and our checkbooks.

Here’s a short list of everyday creeps in alpha order:

–          Affluence creep  [more = more]

–          Beauty creep  [accepted styles and sizes]

–          Celebrity creep  [knowing, being known and in the know]

–          Life situation creep  [correct situation = married with 2.2 kids]

–          Nationalism creep  [God loves us more]

–          Negativism creep  [like most ‘traditional’ media, only the bad news]

Where do you sometimes stray from your own values?  Where do you assume being off kilter or out of sync from life’s messaging means you are personally wrong or inadequate?  How often have you read the gap to mean there must be something wrong with you?

You really have to stop and think about it to find the examples.  And therein lies the danger – it happens without our having to think about it.

It’s like kudzu.  It just creeps right in.

~~~

Please note: I am not advocating asceticism in lieu of luxury, service rather than selfishness or any other judgment.  In fact, my personal content, creeping assets, is relevant only for me.  However you relate to the process of value slip, this is not an all-or-nothing world.  Our challenge is to take all things in proper perspective, with self-prescribed priorities.  Your values and choices are necessarily correct because they are yours.  Just keep things in balance.  Trust me when I say a little entertainment via television is a plus in my life right now.

~~~

We are responsible for the toxins and noise we allow into our lives.

Most who know me can tell you I struggle with addiction.  That’s right – Diet Coke.  When I’m really desperate, I even cave for Diet Pepsi.

I often tell people, “When I die, you can go ahead and sue Coke because I was addicted.”  I am on and off the stuff in predictable cycles of better and worsening habits, and health.

You know the old saying ‘you are what you eat’?  It’s true.  When put that simply we can understand it without pause.  But there are many other things our bodies, minds and souls take in on a daily basis that have equally direct effects on our physical, emotional and spiritual well-being.

–          Friendships.  As I write looking out my back window, I see a little bird.  So, let me ask: who are your peeps?  (I didn’t plan that.)  Ever hear of a ‘frenemy?’  These are people we call friends but whose contact with us creates the same level of stress, or greater, as encounters with straight-out enemies.  We sometimes call them ‘toxic’ or ‘game players.’  We dread their arrivals and praise their departures, yet we continue to let them in.

–          Media.  This scam is bigger than we imagine.  There are the obvious – television, radio and the infamous check-out line headliners.  I don’t need to make a case for messages delivered via Internet, our information superhighway.  There is also product packaging and even retail store layout.  All of this shares the way to a happy, ‘normal’ life – our limits, goals and suggested longings.  It is old-fashioned propaganda, and it does not have your best interest at heart.

–          Pastimes.  There was a time my free hours were spent bicycling and reading.  No longer.  That’s a loss, but here’s a gain.  I once spent post-work hours at local bars with friends from work.  I found that I didn’t feel good about myself when I left, so I stopped going.  Whatever your content, there is both good and bad news.

The bad news first: it takes only three weeks for any behavior to become habit.

Now the good news: it takes only three weeks for any behavior to become habit.

The choice is yours.

–          Thoughts.  Our own internal message boards, our local cable channels, are often the most set in stone.  Thankfully, with a little awareness, they are also the easiest to change.  Let me retract that.  They can be downright painful to identify and edit, but the locus of control rests fully in our hands.  We hold the remote.

Just like my HGTV experience, we don’t have to face any of these influences directly to be strongly affected.  Unlike television, some of it cannot be turned off.

Never underestimate the power of background noise.

~~~

Like my home-improvement crisis, the results of foundation shift are best felt at times of change.

A tall, cold Diet Coke can be refreshing.  However, after I have resisted the stuff for a while, a fresh glass can taste like formaldehyde.  Oh wait – it is formaldehyde!

What I mean to say is creating some gastric distance awakens our senses.

By example, I believe swearing has a place.  When used correctly – that is to say sparingly and at appropriate times – it makes a statement.  However, I find it easy to gradually numb to the words.  Looking back at my writing from some distance down the road can be as jolting as the first Diet Coke after months of water; it tastes awful.  Damn.

The last example I offer is workplace culture.  I once worked for someone who held the line against gossip and office politics.  He didn’t give and inch, a practice I appreciated.  His successor not only allowed the give and take, she promoted and even led it.  Almost overnight we went from dedicated servants to a cross between church camp and Mean Girls.  It was junior high for grown ups.  The change for some, our office ‘players’ and climbers, was exciting.  For me it was as jarring as the HGTV slide.  Even a subtle value shift can have lasting impact.  Damn.  [<– That was overkill, for the record.]

~~~

What I’m really describing here are the effects of the process of fasting.

Cleansing our palates of anything – from soda to words or thoughts – heightens our senses.  It makes us more aware of the thing to which we had become numb, reliant or distant.

A few years ago I did a cleansing fast, the Master Cleanse.  I set out with no prediction of how long I would last.  It was really a spiritual cleanse, but the details don’t matter.

After 28 days I ate for the first time.  And yes, I washed down my meal with Diet Coke.  The results were a mixed bag.  The food tasted better than any I remember before or since.  My taste buds literally exploded with a force of flavors I had previously taken for granted.

The Diet Coke, however, tasted like battery acid.

Fasting is a test that tells us what does and doesn’t work for us, at a specific point in time.

Clarence Jordan explained the origin of fasting as a spontaneous expression of emotion and not the ascetic absence of sustenance as commonly portrayed.

Often this expression of emotion was associated with grief or mourning.  People who grieve tend not to eat, and so the process of fasting, falling into emotion, was mistaken for the outward signs of fasting.

But fasting is much deeper than an apparent absence of sustenance.

In his Sermon on the Mount, Jordan explains further.

“…fasting really means to ‘move fast’ toward a dominating objective.  If taking time to prepare food, or shave, or have your trousers pressed slows you down and prevents you from ‘fasting’ toward your objective, you will do without those things.”

Jordan also speaks to the universality of the practice.

“To some extent, then, all people fast, in that at some time or another there comes into their lives a deep concern or obsession that is stronger than bread or meat.  It may be long-lived or short-lived, but as long as it is there, they will ‘fast.’  The trouble is that too many people get their signals mixed and their sense of values distorted and they move in the wrong direction – toward money or fame or pleasure or profession.  They move fast – toward destruction.  Also, there are always those spiritual mimics who wear the heavenly robes while riding the highway to hell.”

In light of this new definition, what are you moving fast toward?

A few small repairs

Let’s step away from the problems – life’s backsliding, detours and foundation failures.  Instead let’s look at some simple solutions.

If there is one ultimate ‘problem’ at play in the street creep scenario, it is not the creeping.  After all, some homes shift while others do not, and they all reside on the same messaging highway.

Foundation shifts happen due to internal weakening under external pressure.  There are two parts: 1) the weakness of our underpinnings, and 2) the power of the environmental pressure or toxicity.  Some stand up to it; others do not.

In my case there was an external dynamic that had already weakened my base.

If you take Shirley Jackson’s “The Lottery,” add in scapegoating and old-fashioned bullying followed by Hutterite shunning, you’re getting close.  Top the cake with the icing of deep and repeated betrayal by some former peeps, and the conditions necessary for stealth creeping are set.  Some call it dessert.  I call it organization shift – and very bad behavior at that.

The break of the television fast opened the door for HGTV to challenge my quaking soul.  Given the situation, it makes sense.

Thank goodness I was watching home-improvement shows and not What Not to Wear.  I’m not sure my ego would have survived.

For all people and systems, lasting solutions require brave inquiry into our internal and external realities.

~~~

Shawn Colvin has a song called, “A Few Small Repairs.”  The CD is long lost, so I only hear it as background noise (what else?) at Whole Foods.  Darned if it doesn’t play at the times I need it most.

The heroine of the song is Sunny.  She burns down her house.  That is no small life “repair,” but it sure takes care of business.

The reality for those of us in the real world is that the smallest changes can yield big results.  There’s a ton of systems theory to support this, but I’ll keep it simple.  Little = big.  Less = more.

There are just two steps needed to repair the everyday creeps of life.

1. Awareness.
2. Responsive strategies.

Here is a homework assignment to test it out.  If you have performance anxiety, fear not.  Each answer is necessarily correct because it is yours.

1.      Chart yourself in four easy steps.

a)      The inventory.  Make a list of your values – what you believe and why (the people and experiences that inform your beliefs).

b)      Side-by-side comparison.  Make your list a chart by adding a second column.  This is where you list how you currently live.

c)       Explanation.  Add a third column and use it to explain how columns 1 and 2 do or don’t jive.  Remember, there are no wrong or right answers; this is simply a way to understand what’s going on.  Resist judgment.

d)      Strategies.  A final column will help list the small repairs that can make a big difference.

Here’s a sample:

2.       Now take stock of the noise and propaganda in your life.  It can include relationships, activities and common media outlets.  How does this list compare to your chart?  Does it support your values, or does it compete?

The intrinsically valid charts are as unique as you and I.  The bottom line for all of us is that our environments are reflections of our souls.  This includes beliefs, activities, people and more.

If we don’t like the networks that play on our TV sets, it’s our job to change the channel – or turn the damned thing off.

Periodically inspecting and reparging our individual foundations is our personal responsibility.

~~~

So far we have addressed personal underpinning and outside influences.  While this is valid and important, there are larger, more critical applications.

In any situation, there are at least a few avenues for reflection.

–          The self

–          The individual and the divine

–          The individual in close relationship

–          The individual in community

Let’s turn off HGTV and set our sights for the big screen.  Step out onto the world stage with me for a moment.

I don’t know about you, but for me there is liberation in perspective, a view from 30,000 feet.

Listening to the evening news is one thing.  A half hour of Univision or the BBC reminds me of my place in the grand scheme of things.  It is a large textured world, and it is bigger than all of us.

~~~

Close your eyes and revisit 1940s Germany.  Can you see the war-era motion picture in your mind?

We all know about Adolph Hitler and the story.  He remains perhaps humankind’s most vile mass murderer.  That’s exactly what it was – unparalleled, inexcusable mass murder, an attempt to snuff out an entire race and culture of people for no reason except they are different than the dominant culture.

The conditions that allowed the horror of the Holocaust are complex.  Maybe.

The foundation materials of most homes are the same: mid-century European values of family, hard work and patriotism.  These are shared by a diverse group of people, including a whole bunch of church goers, good people.

The driveways or portals to the people include a propaganda machine that is far more than background noise.  It is all networks on every communication medium.  The propaganda master owns the parent company.

The highway prominent out front is populated by war, creeping nationalism, fear and outright insanity.

Do you remember my HGTV slip?  I was firmly set in long-held beliefs until I succumbed to the noise of home-improvement.  In just a few weeks my beliefs turned 180 degrees.  I gave in to the current of propaganda without ever thinking about it.  It just happened.

Right.

~~~

If 1940s Europe seems too far a reach, try out these examples.

–          Post-colonial American slavery

–          1940s Japanese American internment

–          Kosovo

–          Rwanda

–          Darfur

Still too far removed for current relevance where you stand?  Okay, hold on tight; it’s about to get personal.

Close your eyes.  Return to 2002 America.  The reality is post-9/11 terror.  The propaganda includes fear, freedom and creeping nationalism.  Some may disagree, but creeping nationalism is not itself a bad thing.  In fact, given the situation, a rise in nationalism is the only thing that makes sense.  The only ‘problem’ is how this force was directed.

Put simply, we were duped.

In spite of thorough investigation and demonstrated facts that the nation of Iraq and its leader did not possess weapons of mass destruction or have links to al-Qaeda, our President built a wall of propaganda to justify pummeling the country and placing our brave troops in grave danger.

Granted, Hussein was no saint, and we knew that.  His own people knew it best.  But tying him and ‘them’ to 9/11 through an invisible web of nonexistent data carries a huge responsibility.  We took lives on both sides – theirs and ours – for the convenience of ridding the world of a really bad guy who had not one thing to do with 9/11.  Two birds, one stone, self-dealing, regional interests – all that.

We went along with it.  We let it creep right in, in spite of the glaring lack of substantive connection.  The noise went hand in hand with our very real and justifiable emotion following the massive, sick, unthinkable attacks.

Viewed as an objective process through the lens of fact, it really is sobering.  Propaganda is a powerful force.

~~~

If we take it down to the small stage, social and political creeping are equally relevant if not more personal close to home.

Our local dramas play out according to the same process.  Someone or something is targeted or labeled.  In spite of the facts, we play along.  Emotion carries what reason lacks.   Some seek to take advantage of the situation for their own promotion.  Others deny to avoid action, and others are simply numbed by the buzz.  Power transitions are notorious breeding grounds for this kind of thing.

Every community has its background noise and its straight-up full-volume yarns woven by bad intent or simple boredom.

Think of your family, your faith community, your workplace.  Revisit your list of propaganda influences.

There is creeping a plenty.

Where do you stand in times of transition or crisis?

Will you speak out for the common good, even at your own expense?

Will you even see it happening, or are you so out of touch with your foundation, or recently weakened as I was, that the creeping goes unnoticed?

Will you know what’s happening and choose to take advantage of the situation for your own promotion, to get ahead or appear a hero?

None of us can predict the answers.  The conditions among a specific group of people at a specific point in time will tell the tale.

All we can do is prepare ourselves through regular reflective inspections and periodic repairs.

~~~

What is certain is creeping at each level – the world stage, the community theatre and our interpersonal worlds – is connected.

If I, Mitzi, am firmly set on my concrete slab, I am less likely to give in to community pressures.  I am more likely to take an important stand as a local situation of injustice unfolds.

A healthy community is more likely to keep its government in check.

A nation free of looming toxins is a more decent world player.

And so it goes.

Each and every one of us is responsible to ourselves, our neighbors and our world every single day.

~~~

Solidly (re)set

Even before I created the values chart above, I made a short list of strategies for getting back on track post HGTV, for being more true to me.

I signed up for a conference this fall.  It celebrates the community that sparked my strongest beliefs and its founder, my favorite contrarian, who would turn 100 this year if still living.

It is a community based in reconciliation and justice.  Sometimes justice and peace come through hard truths and difficult conversations.  Sometimes the place we need to be reconciled is with ourselves, our own souls and foundations.  Other times it is relational or tied to an entire community or system.

I also made contact with a local group – people right here who live according to my foundational values.  I didn’t dive in, not yet.  Community is about shared outcome and process, but it is also based in genuine relationships.  It happens organically over time.

The value – no, POWER – of actions, heart and soul in sync with our environmental noise is enormous.  It is liberating and empowering, not confining.  It is life-strengthening, not numbing.

It is more valuable than any million-dollar home with exquisite granite and the most exceptional crown molding.

~~~

There is one final strategy I offer.  It is basic – and the source of my shame during my recent foundation failure.

Do you remember when I spelled out the problems with my SAC by Stealth Asset Creep?  I said there were two practical problems – the scant time it took to be won over by HGTV and the unconscious questioning of my own personal adequacy.

I also said there is a third issue more important than these.  Thankfully, as these things work, it is also the simplest strategy for getting set back in place.

This elusive and once-forgotten asset: gratitude.

I accepted the propaganda that I lack something materially.  I lost my sense of gratitude and awareness of how abundantly I am blessed.  Related to my self-absorbed shift in focus is the loss of my firm belief that I have more than enough and that my responsibility is to share with others to whom chance has not been as generous.

As only an American can, I saw my home through the lens of what is missing.  The fact is it is more than I need and more than I deserve.

After all, I am not more important than someone born in a garbage dump in Guatemala.  I am more lucky.

Luck brings responsibility to use my relative wealth, comfort and freedom to share resources and lighten the load for someone else – some equally worthy and uniquely beautiful – whether down the road or across the globe.

~~~

With that I am turning off the noise of the information superhighway for a spell.  Even my computer has its place.

HGTV, I thank you.  I am grateful for the lesson – the backsliding, the reality check and the renewed connection to my base.  I am thankful even for the loss of a whole flock of dissonant peeps and the gain of a few others who are in sync, whose noise is in tune with my own.

There is still a place in my life for home-improvement television.  It now rests on a more solid foundation, and I hold the remote.

Now that is soul improvement.

© Mitzi Viola, 7/14/12